Joker vs Satan
by HSH
Summary: It's the Harlequin of Hate vs the Light Bearer. When these two ulitmate evils compete to see who's worse, Gotham City pays the price for it. The two's nemesis's God and Batman aren't about to let the two destroy Gotham City.
1. Chapter 1

The Joker glances out the window. Outside of the building, cops are everywhere. _Excellent just as I wanted. I want them to see this. _Joker thinks to himself. Joker then turns back to the hostages that he has tied up to chairs.

There are two of them, a teenage boy and girl who were going out. "So kids having fun?" Joker asks them, smiling, trying to seem nice. "Go to hell," the boy says. The Joker laughs, not knowing how soon that is to happen.

Joker turns to the girl, "What about you, how do you feel about this, sweetie?" "Please let me go!" the girl pleads, crying. "But if I were to do that then you would miss the fun!" Joker says, with excitement.

The girl starts crying even more. "What do you want with us?" the boy asks, trying to sound brave. "I want to play a game," Joker says. "A game?" "Yes a game."

Before the boy could respond, Commissioner Gordon talks with a microphone, "Joker let the hostages go!" Joker walks over to the window, "We're kinda in the middle of something right now, flat foot but don't worry you have a part to play to."

Joker looks back at the hostages, "Now where were we? Oh yes, a game! So how do you kids feel about spin the bottle?" Neither one of them respond. "Yeah your right, you guys must already be at second base," Joker says.

"Oh I know!" Joker exclaims. "What?" the boy asks. "Let play Ice Breakers!"Joker states. "Ice Breakers?" the boy asks, confused and annoyed at the same time.

"Yes and I'll be the one to break it," Joker reveals; "Now without further ado, Katherine is it?" The girl nods, crying. "Well, Katherine I understand that you listen to Tailor Swift and you write romantic music and you're in a band. Is that correct?" Joker asks. Katherine nods.

"Now tell me what do you expect in a guy?" Joker demands. Katherine looks at him confused, "What?" "Answer the question or I'll blow you damn head off," Joker says, sweetly.

The girl cries harder. "I won't ask again," Joker says, this time rougher. "He has to be romantic, sweet, good looking, "Katherine answers, still crying.

"Non- perverted?" Joker asks. Katherine nods. "Well I gotta shock for you, sister!" Joker says laughing. "What?" "Your boyfriend masturbates twenty times a day! His friends call him, what was it called? Oh yes! The whacking off king!" Joker says laughing.

Katherine looks at her boyfriend, "Brian?" "Oh and wait till you here the best part! Oh well video speaks for itself," Joker says before pulling out a tape and placing into a VCR and turning the TV on.

The tape shows Brian in his bedroom with another girl. Joker laughs as the tape rolls. "Brian? What did you do?" Katherine asks him, angrily. "What? Your concerned about that? When we're being held hostage by the world's most notorious criminal?" Brian argues.

"We're waiting, Brian," Joker says, "Tell her how you want to get laid and that it annoys you of how religious you are. Or wait even better! Tell her what you said about her music and her dream to become like Tailor Swift! Or should I play the other tape?"

Katherine turns to Brian, "What did you say?" "I didn't say anything, he's lying!" Brian argues.

Joker laughs, "And they call me a liar!" Joker pulls out a tape recorder and pressed play. A voice is heard, "So Brian why is your girlfriend in a band?" Brian responds by saying, "Oh cause she has a shit dream of becoming like Tailor Swift."

"Brian? Do you really think that?" Katherine asks him. "What? No! I…" Joker cuts Brian off, "Don't worry, Kathy you'll get your revenge."

Joker then unties her. Katherine gets up, confused. Joker pulls out a gun and hands it to her.

"What do you want me to do with this?" Katherine asks. "I want you to kill your shitty excuse for a boyfriend," Joker orders.

"What? I can't do that! I'm not a murderer!" Katherine argues. "Think of how much he's hurt you then. All that pain! How angry does he make you feel?" Joker reasons.

"It's still not enough for me to want to kill him. Even though he's not the kind of boyfriend I thought he was," Katherine says. "Well how touching! You teenage girls are overly romantic. Unfortunately this is real life and we're not living in a fairy land," Joker says before pulling out his gun.

Katherine looks at him shocked, "What are you going to do to him?" "I'm gonna shoot him in his face, silly," Joker says as if he was talking to a five year old girl about Santa Clause.

Katherine aims her gun at him, "You can't I won't let you!" Joker turns to her surprise, "Oh no! Can it be? Does innocent, virgin teenage girl actually have guts?"

Katherine pulls the trigger and a flag that says "Bang!" comes out. The Joker laughs hysterically at these turn of events.

"You've got spirit, kid, I'll give you that. That's why I'm going to let you live," Joker says before turning back to her boyfriend.

Before he can do anything, though, the lights in the room go out. "I was wondering when you were going to show up, Batsy!" Joker gleefully says. "It's over Joker! Let them go!" orders Batman. "Come on Bat breath, you know me well enough to know that will never happen," Joker retorts.

Batman kicks the Joker, knocking him onto the wall. Joker retaliates by firing several shots. An unseen fist then slams the Joker in his face. Joker grunts as Batman continues to hit him.

Batman continues until he eventually grabs Joker by his collar and slams him against the wall, "It's over Joker!" "It hasn't even begun," Joker sputters, coughing up blood.

A knife falls out of Joker's sleeve and into his hand. Joker shoves it through Batman's armor and into his chest. Batman groan and lets go of Joker before falling to the ground.

Joker unwittingly steps in front of the window and begins to laugh hysterically. In fact he's so busy laughing that he feels to notice a sniper dot on his shoulder.

Joker is then hit in his shoulder. Joker screams in pain before getting hit several times in his back. Joker loses balance and falls backwards, out the window, laughing all the way.

As he's falling several stories, Joker laughs so hard that he can hardly breathe. Joker keeps it up until he hits the hard pavement below…


	2. Chapter 2

Joker wakes up on the pavement. He sees police everywhere. Joker stands up and places his hands in the air, "Alright I give up!" The police don't acknowledge him.

Joker wonders why until he sees his lifeless body lying on the pavement with blood everywhere. Batman and Gordon are standing over his body.

"It's hard to believe that he's finally gone," Gordon says. "Yes, I'm just glad that it wasn't me who had to do it," Batman says.

"So he does care," Joker says. "Yes God only knows why," a voice says behind him. Joker turns around and sees a man wearing a black suit, standing there.

"Who are you?" Joker asks. "I'm Death," the man says. "I really am dead?" "Yes about time. After so many false alarms it's good to finally meet you," Death says. "Yes I know, I don't know how I lived this ling either," Joker agrees.

"So what do we do now?" Joker asks. "It's time for me to take you to meet God," Death answers. "I get to meet God? Do I get to meet Satan to?" Joker asks him. "We'll see," Death says before teleporting them to a plain white area.

Where are we?" Joker asks him. "Limbo," Death says. "Why?" "So God can judge you," Death answers, "Now I'm going to leave and word from the wise, don't anger him." Death then disappears.

A light shines down on him. "I thought you said that I was to talk with God not aliens," Joker laughs. "SILENCE!" a voice booms.

"Nope this is definitely God," Joker says. "Enough! Now Jack Napier let's get down to business," God says. "Um… actually it's Joker. I haven't answered to that name in well years," Joker argues.

"You dare argue with the one who decides where you go?" God says, angrily. "Listen, God look I may be insane but…" "Why are you still talking? One more word from you and I will smite you and bring you back, do you understand?" God threatens.

"I'm starting to like you," Joker says. "Now I know of everything you've done. You've murdered, you've stolen, you've kidnapped, you've vandalized, you've raped, disfigured. You've broken every law in Gotham City and beyond. You also have been a firm atheist ever since your transformation into what you call, the Joker. You haven't performed a good deed since you were twenty five. You disgust me and disgrace all my creation. You are the second most despicable thing I've ever created," God says.

"Second?" Joker asks. "Yes second to the devil himself," God says, "Now you and I both know what will become of you." "Yeah it's funny cause just moments ago someone told me to go to Hell," Joker says laughing.

"Is there anything you would like to say before I damn you?" God asks. "Yeah why is limbo so boring?" Joker asks him. "Good bye, Jack," God says before teleporting him away to Hell.


	3. Chapter 3

Joker finds himself in a dark cave filled with fire. Joker feels the flames burning him and for the first time doesn't laugh at pain and instead screams. Joker tries running out of the flames.

As he's in the process of running he bumps into a tallish man. Joker falls down when he hits him. He looks up and sees that it's John Wilkes Booth.

"Say don't I know you form somewhere?" Joker asks him. "I'd tell you to got Hell but we're already here!" Booth says before picking up Joker by his collar.

Before Booth can lay a hand on him a man walks over to them, "Booth have you forgotten about our sessions?" Booth drops the Joker. "No stay away from me!"Booth screams, completely terrified.

In a blink of an eye the man charges into Booth and knocks him into an abyss in the cave, both fall down it.

Joker gets up to his feet and all around him he sees fire, people burning, people fighting, people getting tortured, and other horrible things. Joker laughs, "I think I'm gonna like it here."

"You must be the new guy," a voice behind him says. Joker turns around and sees a man standing there. The man wears a very expensive suit and looks to be about in his twenties and is very handsome.

"Now don't tell me, your Jack the Ripper," Joker says. "No I'm the devil," the man says. "You mean the devil?" Joker asks. "Yes, others call me Satan or Lucifer," Satan says.

"So what do you want?" Joker asks. "I heard that you were here and I wanted to meet you personally," Satan answers. "Why?" "Because you amuse me. One would say that you're just as evil as me," Satan explains.

"Oh mercy me, I impressed the devil himself," Joker says. "Yes well I've got to go now, places to go, people to torture, we'll keep in touch," Satan says before disappearing.

Joker begins to walk all around Hell, watching people suffer until he bumps into another man, who just so happens to be a criminal that the Joker killed in an explosion with a bunch of other different criminals.

"Well, well, look who we've got here! Hey boys, guess who!" the man shouts. The other men that the Joker killed join him and surround Joker.

"Now, now boys, I hope that you're not still mad at me about blowing you up to Hell, literally," Joker says. One of the men punches Joker in his face. Another one kicks him.

Joker falls to the ground. One of them tries kicking him in his face but Joker grabs his foot and makes him lose balance, knocking him to the floor. Joker kicks another guy's leg, knocking him over.

The remaining guys start kicking him in his stomach. Joker coughs up blood. Joker lies there getting kicked for a while until a man comes over to them and they run away, in fear.

Joker sits up and stairs at the man. It's the same one who attacked Booth. "Looks like I get the honor of torturing the Joker," the man says. "I'm sorry who are you?" Joker asks him.

"My name is Azazel, I'm a demon and one of the princes of Hell," the "man" says. "Oh Hell," Joker says before laughing hysterically. Azazel then grabs the Joker and teleports away with him, with the Joker still laughing.


	4. Chapter 4

Azazel takes Joker to a dark room, full of weapons and other torturous devices. "Are you sure this isn't Heaven," Joker asks before getting thrown onto a chair by the demon.

"Make yourself comfortable," Azazel says. "I must say this chair sucks," Joker complains, laughing. "You'll be complaining about then the chair in a minute, trust me," Azazel says.

Azazel then turns to the torture devices and pick up a vial of acid. "No thanks I'm not thirsty," Joker says before the acid is tossed onto him. Joker laughs. "Got anymore of that juice?" Joker asks.

Azazel tosses more onto him. Joker laughs some more. "Come on, really? You're a demon; can't you be a little more creative?" Joker taunts. The demon punches the Joker but the Joker only laughs some more.

Azazel stands there, thinking for a minute before getting an idea. Azazel grabs a barrel of acid. "Open wide!" Azazel commands. "You're not gonna rape me are you?" Joker asks.

Azazel uses telekinesis to make the Joker open his mouth before dumping the acid into it. Joker screams, coughs up, blood before laughing some more.

"Got any more of that?" Joker asks him. Azazel screams in anger and hits the Joker again, this time so hard that the Joker falls backwards. Joker simply laughs again.

Azazel proceeds to kick him multiple times in his stomach, making Joker cough up galloons of blood. Joker's spirit isn't broken, however and he just keeps on laughing.

Azazel grabs him by his collar and slams him against the wall. "Stop laughing! It's not funny!" Azazel screams, "Why aren't you in pain?" "Because it is funny," Joker sputters.

Azazel screams and punches the Joker in his face with all his strength. Joker continues to giggle and laugh the whole time. From the multiple blows, Joker get bruises, black eyes, a broken nose, and most of his teeth missing. Blood is everywhere.

Joker giggles and tries his best to laugh. Azazel curses and throws him to the ground. Joker continues laughing and tries to get up. Azazel uses telekinesis to throw him onto the wall.

"Stop laughing right now!" Azazel screams. Joker laughs even harder. Azazel snaps his finger and Joker explodes, literally, with his blood and insides flying everywhere.


	5. Chapter 5

Joker wakes up back where he first appeared at in Hell. All of his injuries have disappeared and he has been completely rejuvenated. Joker laughs at these turn of event.

Azazel appears before him. "What are you going to do now? Beat the hell out of me, again?" Joker asks him.

"No actually, I would like to offer you an apprenticeship," Azazel says. "Apprenticeship?" Joker asks him. "Yes it is very interesting of how you enjoyed the pain. You remind me of a younger version of myself," Azazel reveals.

"So why were you so pissed then?" Joker inquires. "Because I was in the moment, after I destroyed you I began to think and since I have been in search of an apprentice for some time, I have decided that you are the perfect man for the job," Azazel explains.

"I see, what if I say no?" Joker asks. "Then I will damn you into the deepest parts of Hell where you will be consumed by the Hell fire for all eternity and that my friend, is something that not even you would laugh at," Azazel threatens. Joker laughs, "Well good thing that I'm saying yes, then."

"Yes it is. Now come, we have work to do," Azazel says before teleporting both of them away. Azazel brings them back to the torture chamber and John Wilkes Booth is strapped to a chair.

"Now I assuming that you know what to do?" Azazel asks. "You betcha I am!" Joker declares. "Good," Azazel says before disappearing.

Joker laughs, "Now what is your name?" "John Wilkes Booth!" Booth says, terrified. "Nope doesn't ring a bell," Joker mocks before pulling out a knife.

Joker throws it into his stomach. Booth grunts. "I've been here for over two hundred years, I have experienced a lot worse than that," Booth says.

Joker pulls out a poison tipped knife. Joker stabs him with it. Booth screams. "That's more like it!" Joker says. Joker then proceeds to stab Booth multiple times.

Joker then pulls out a blow torch and sets Booth on fire. Booth screams in pain as Joker starts shooting him with arrows. Joker laughs at Booth's pain.

Joker continues to do this to Booth until Booth "dies" and disappears. "Where'd he go?" Joker asks. Azazel reappears, "To where you were when you came back. You can't die in Hell since you are already dead." "I see."

"Well I've got someone else that I would like for you to meet," Azazel says. "Oh boy, hit me mama seta!" Joker declares.

Azazel brings Joker to Adolf Hitler. Joker torches him in a similar way until Hitler dies and disappears to regenerate. Joker moves onto the men who beat him up, earlier and kills them as well.

Joker continues to torture the likes of Nero, Stalin, Al Capone as well as a bunch of unknown, unimportant people who have gone to Hell.

Though Joker enjoys his new home, he misses wreaking havoc in Gotham City as well as misses his friends in Arkham, Harley Quinn, but most of all, Batman who he will never get to fight and torment again. He even misses Commissioner Gordon.

Joker, of course keeps this to himself but the feeling never leaves. Eventually after a while he grows bored of torturing souls and misses Gotham even more.


	6. Chapter 6

One day he is approached by Satan just after he killed Hitler for the ninth time. "What do you want?" Joker asks. "I've seen what you've been doing and I must say that I'm impressed," Satan says.

"Well thank you," Joker says, not really caring. "Why the sad face?" Satan asks, seemingly concerned. "I just miss my home in Gotham. That's all," Joker confesses. "Oh so you're not enjoying your new home in Hell?" Satan inquires.

"No it's been great here, it's just missing something that makes it feel like home," Joker says. "Such as?" "Well for one, when I kill people I wish them to stay dead permanently. Also I have friends that I left behind," Joker says.

"Well I was gonna ask you this anyway but your unhappiness hear prompts me to ask it even more," Satan says. "What were you going to say," Joker asks.

"Everyone's been saying that you're either as bad as or worse than I am. And I wanted to offer a contest between us," Satan asks him. "Ah do I since some jealousy that the devil harbors towards me," Joker says.

"I don't like to be outranked. Do you know the story of how I fell?" Satan asks. "No, I uh never was able to make it to church," Joker admits, with a smile.

"Well, I was the most beautiful and beloved of the angels. Only my older brother, Michael and God stood above me and I accepted that. And then God made you. And you know what? God favored them and paid more attention to them! Over us! The angels! We were better looking! We were far more powerful and yet he chooses you humans over us. And then he had the nerve, the nerve to order us to bow before them and to serve them and accept them as a higher on the food chain then us.

And that did it! I was done! I went to some of my fellow angels who were also unhappy at this change. I persuaded them to join me and to make a stand against this new ruling! I was successfully able to convert a third of Heaven's angels to my side.

Unfortunately, God didn't respond well to my rebellious attitude and he had Michael, my own brother, who I was closer to than anyone else to lead the rest of Heaven's army against us! We weren't strong enough and were then casted out of Heaven and as punishment for what I did God made me the flipside of him and made me have the burden or ruling over here.

So here I now take my anger out on God's new favorite and do whatever I can to bring down as many of them as possible! But tell me, all I did was one bad thing and I get punished and hated more than any other being," Satan explains.

Joker pretends to snore before saying, "Well it seems like you just another bratty child who threw a temper tantrum because his daddy wouldn't buy him a pony for his sweet sixteen and so God sent you to your room, where you continues to whine and cry like a little baby!"

"Watch it, Napier! Or I'll damn you to the Hell fire," Satan growls. "Fair enough," Joker says, "Now about that competition."

"Oh yes, I was thinking, I bring you back and give you demonic abilities for one night and send you out to Gotham. We will then compete to see who can kill the most people in one night," Satan explains.

"What happens if I win?" Joker asks. "Then I'll bring you back. But if you lose, well, you go into the Hell fire for all eternity," Satan says, "So do we have a deal?" Satan extend his hand. Joker shakes it, "Hell yeah!" With that both Joker and Satan disappear out of Hell.


	7. Chapter 7

Joker wakes up in his coffin. He burst out of it and digs out of the ground, to the surface. Joker laughs, wildly. Joker stands up and walks out of Gotham Graveyard, the city.

As Joker's walking through the street a car almost hits him. The car stops in front of Joker and honks his horn.

Joker throws a fire ball out of his hand and blows up the car. Joker laughs at his new found power, "Awesome!" Joker then proceeds to blow up the many cars in his sight.

After destroying all of the cars, Joker approaches a building. Joker throws many fire balls at it, catching it on fire. Joker laughs as it burns to the ground.

Joker walks through the city, causing death and destruction wherever he goes until he reaches a club where a heavy metal concert is at. The band performing is Metallica and they're in the middle of performing "Enter Sandman".

Joker walks to the entrance of the club. The bouncer blocks his path. "Piss off, clown," the bouncer hisses. Joker touches the bouncer's shoulder and sets him completely on fire before he incinerates. "There's gonna be a hot time in the town tonight!" Joker says, laughing before he enters the club.

Joker makes two machetes appear in his hands and he butchers everyone in his path. The loud music, blocks out the sound of the people being slaughtered.

A guard notices what the Joker is doing and he runs to him. Joker turns around and blows him a kiss, freezing him. Joker laughs at his misfortune.

Just then Batman swings in on a bat rope and kicks the Joker in his stomach, sending him flying backwards into a wall.

Batman lands on his feet. "You? How are you supposed to be dead?" Batman demands, confused. "I've got friends on the other side," Joker says, laughing.

Batman charges towards him, Joker stands up and extend his arm out, aiming it towards him. Several electrical charges shoots out of his finger and hit Batman in his chest and picks him up off his feet. Batman screams as he is electrocuted. Joker uses the electricity to throw him onto the wall.

Joker laughs at this. The music is still loud so the people are still not noticing Joker's killing spree. Joker than proceed to slaughter more people.

Suddenly, a batarang digs into his shoulder. A beeping noise is then heard and it blows up, sending Joker flying in the air. Joker lands on the ground and sees Batman regaining his feet.

"Listen, Batboob, I have a tight schedule right now and I don't have time for this, surely you understand," Joker says before snapping his fingers and blowing Batman up, in the same manner that Azazel did him.

Joker stairs at his fallen opponent's remains and this time doesn't laugh. "I'll miss you Batsy, I really will," Joker then takes a moment of silence for his fallen enemy before slaughtering all the remaining people in the club with the exception of the Metallica band members who are too busy playing to notice any of this.


	8. Chapter 8

Batman stares at his remains, in horror. He then watches on as Joker slaughters countless people.

Death then appears before him and touches his shoulder, teleporting him to limbo. Batman looks around limbo, confused. A light shines down on him.

"Hello, Bruce Wayne," God greets him. "Are you God?" Batman asks him. "I am," God answers. "Am I in Heaven?" Batman inquires. "No you're in limbo, the center of the universe, between Heaven, Hell, and Earth," God explains.

"So what will become of me?" Batman asks, "Do I get to go to Heaven?" "Not today. I have work for you," God declares.

"Work? But I'm dead," Batman says. "I'm God, I can bring you back," God says, insulted.

"What can I do to help you?" Batman asks. "Joker and Satan are going on a rampage in Gotham City, competing to see who can kill the most people. I need you to stop them," God explains.

"But lord, how can you expect me to take on two powerhouses?" questions Batman. Just then a sword appears before Batman. "This is the sword of Michael, the Archangel. If you stab them with it then they will be banished back to Hell," God explains.

Batman takes the sword. "I will also give you resistance against their supernatural abilities and if they kill you, I shall automatically bring you back," God promises.

"But why can't you just save us all the trouble and defeat them, yourself?" Batman asks. "God works in mysterious ways," God says before teleporting Batman away.


	9. Chapter 9

Batman stands where he was killed at, his body fully restored, in his hand is Michael's sword. Batman looks around the room and sees police everywhere in the club as well as dead bodies lying all over the place.

Batman quickly leaves the club and runs to the Bat mobile before driving away. Wherever he drives he sees dead bodies all over the place and building's burning. "Damn that clown!" growls Batman.

Before long, Batman catches sight of Satan, incinerating several people. Batman launches a rocket from the Bat mobile. The rocket hits Satan, knocks him into and abandoned building before exploding. The building catches fire and collapses on top of Satan.

Satan bursts out of the rubble and throws a big fire ball at the Bat mobile. The Bat mobile catches fire. "Danger! Danger! Over heating!" the Bat mobile's computer says. Batman hits the ejector seat button and the hood comes off before Batman is launched out, just as the Bat mobile explodes.

Batman uses his cape to glide to the ground. Just as he lands, Satan throws a fireball at him. Batman dodges it and throws a batarang back at him. Satan laughs at burns the batarang before throwing another fireball.

Batman covers himself in his cape which protects him from the flames of the fire ball. Batman stands up and brushes the fire off before getting hit by one. The fireball incinerates him.

Batman regenerates, fully unharmed. Satan's smile fades as he stares at him, shocked. "No it can't be! I don't believe it!" Satan screams. "Believe it," Batman says before throwing a flash bomb at him.

The bomb blinds Satan as Batman runs into him and kicks him in his chest, knocking him over. Batman prepares to strike Satan with the sword.

Before he can bring it down onto him, Satan regains his sight and throws Batman several miles. Batman goes flying and screams as hits the pavement of Gotham Central Park, several miles away from where he was thrown.

Awakes up, still alive and says, "I'm going to start going to church." Satan teleports in front of him, "Why can't you just die?" Batman tries stabbing Satan with the sword but Satan uses telekinesis to knock it away.

Satan grabs Batman by his neck at begins to beat him, mercilessly. Batman continues to cough up blood as Satan beats the ever living shit out of him. Satan stops for a moment a uses telekinesis to call Michael's sword to his hand.

"Michael's sword? You talked to God, didn't you?" Satan asks. Batman tries to answer but his face is to numb to.


	10. Chapter 10

Joker arrives on the scene and sees what Satan did to Batman. "Nobody dicks with Batman but me!" Joker says before tossing Satan away with telekinesis. Satan flies backwards as slams through a tree, dropping the sword in the process.

Satan gets back. "Stop, you don't understand! God has formed an alliance with Batman. With God's help, Batman is unstoppable!" Satan argues. "Yeah right!" Joker says before tossing a fire ball at him.

Satan catches it and throws it back at him. Joker catches it and absorbs it before using telekinesis to throw a tree at Satan. Satan punches through the tee.

"Joker stop! I'm not gonna harm Batman! I'm just warning you that with God on Batman's side we stand no chance so maybe…" Joker cuts him short by freezing him.

Satan breaks out of the ice. "That's it, I'm done," Satan growls. In a blink of an eye Satan is upon the Joker and hits him with all his strength, sending him flying into the nearest building. The building collapses on top of him.

Joker comes out of the rubbles and teleports back into the park and electrocutes Satan. Satan falls to the ground and screams in pain. Joker laughs as he fries Satan.

Satan uses telekinesis to knock Joker to the ground. Satan gets to his feet and deflects a fireball sent from the Joker. Satan snaps his finger. Joker tries to throw another fire ball but he can't.

"What did you do?" Joker shrieks. "I gave you your powers, now I'm gonna take it away," Satan simply states before hitting him with a fireball, killing him. Satan laughs, "Now that was funny!"

As Satan has back turned Michael's sword teleports into Batman's hand. Batman uses the last bit of his strength to leap into Satan and stabs him in the back with the sword. Satan screams as he is teleported back to Hell.

Batman then drops the sword and falls over. God then heals Batman of all his injuries. Batman looks over and sees that the sword is gone.


	11. Chapter 11

Joker and Satan reappear in Hell. Azazel greets them. Satan turns to Azazel, "Did you add up the scores?" "Yes, my lord, I have. And I'm afraid that the Joker has bested you," Azazel announces.

Satan screams. "Oh jeez, you're not gonna throw another temper tantrum are you?" Joker taunts him.

"Don't push your luck. I am going to keep my word and send you back but just to let you know, you won't celebrating when you come back here, I can promise you that," Satan threatens. "Yeah, yeah, whatever, jeeves, now what are you waiting for? Send me back!" Joker shouts, laughing.

Satan sighs and snaps his fingers, resurrecting Joker.


	12. Chapter 12

Joker finds himself alive and well in the police station. Cops are surrounding him. "I hate the devil," Joker groans.

Harvey Bullock aims his gun at him, "Get on the ground now!" Joker puts his hands on his head gets onto his knees.

Joker is hand cuffed and taken away. "Ah feels so good to be home," Joker says to himself, smiling as he is being escorted to an armored car.

Joker is put into the back of the car and finds himself sitting next to a soon to be Arkham inmate. "Have you been to Arkham before?" the man asks him. "Ha! Only a million times!" Joker brags.

"Is it scary? I mean I heard that it's like Hell," the man asks. "No, no, it's nothing like Hell. I would know," Joker says before laughing hysterically as the man stares at him confused.


End file.
